A dope-ass life is the goal, right? But what does that mean? You say you want to be successful. However, how will you feel when you manifest the pictures in your mind, yet still struggle with an old hurt, trauma or insecurity?
Real talk: Success and happiness are not synonymous. Both require intentionality and effort. Yet, the internal work necessary is under-acknowledged.
Here are four crucial internal practices to ensure total success.
1. Identify Who You Want to Become
Instead of giving all your focus to what you want to do, take a moment and contemplate who you want to be(come). This means taking an inward look at your Self. Ask your Self how do you want to feel inside? Don’t just say, I want to be happy. Identify what happy looks and feels like to you: What kind of relationship do you have with yourself? Do you trust yourself? Do you treat yourself like your best friend or beloved partner? What does confidence look like? Do you follow through? It will be easier to navigate the external world when you invest internal time learning to truly love, trust and champion your Self.2. Identify Five Core Values to Guide Your Actions in 2019 and Beyond
After you identify who you want to become, identify five core values that can act as your North Star. These core values will guide you when making key decisions. They will help choose the people and partnerships you commit to, and also support you in thinking and taking actions that align with who you say you want to be. If, for example, you say in first practice above that you want to be more compassionate, you may want to consider making compassion one of your core values. Identifying and honoring your core values will hold you accountable to grow into more of the person you want to be.
3. Choose to Grow
I don’t have to tell you that there’s an area in your life that needs you to pay attention to it. Instead of avoiding this area, feeling shame, thinking and hoping that your success will rid you of the discomfort it causes you, put on your big girl or boy pants and intentionally free yourself from this challenge. The saying, “Pay me now or pay later,” is particularly apropos when it comes to internal fears and hurt that we try to avoid. Avoiding past issues does not make them go away. The only way to resolve the past is to address it. Otherwise, the discomfort you feel robs you of your ability to truly be confident and happy.
4. Tell Your Self the Truth
The starting point for a thriving life is for you to become in sync with yourself. Self-trust begins with telling yourself the truth about everything – how you really feel about what you’re doing, who you are, how you are behaving, etc. You may not be ready or feel capable of telling others the whole truth and nothing but the truth. However, to eventually be able to authentically do you, practice telling yourself the truth. When you find yourself dancing around the truth practice talking to yourself out loud as you complete this sentence: If I tell myself the truth, I feel/am/want ________. Telling yourself the truth will allow you to lovingly work with yourself. It sends a message to the brain and heart that you can be trusted to navigate problems and danger.Becoming “fully alive” is a dope-ass way to live your best life in 2019!
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